Buongiorno Principessa!

Either the teacher is late or the class was canceled and the 6 people who showed up missed the memo.

Dec 2nd

Santa just gave me a Starbucks gift card. Well, a man on the street dressed as Santa did anyway....

Dec 2nd

I swear to god i just saw Ugly Betty’s ulgy twin sister

Dec 2nd

Selfish Butt-head

Dec 1st

Roommate and I just dramatically yelled “GUT BUSTING” at the same time…unplanned.

Dec 1st

I somehow managed to get myself stuck in a revolving door.

Dec 1st

Our president has the same slogan as Bob the Builder

Nov 30th

Holy shit! Long distance roommate just showed up out of nowhere and scared me half to death

Nov 30th

I think my toe is broken

Nov 30th

I miss him

Nov 30th

Boyfriend just punched me in the face

Nov 29th

My face is swollen..it’s super sexy

Nov 28th

Finally it’s ok to listen to Christmas music.

Nov 28th

Ok guys don’t take Benadryl on an empty stomach and drink alcohol. You WILL make a fool of...

Nov 28th

Granny with her hands covered in dough: “I feel like spider-man”

Nov 27th

Mallard Ducks

Nov 27th

Why did you put brown bananas in my smoothie?

Nov 27th

My work smells like rotten pumpkin juices and chinese food. Nasty.

Nov 27th

Music Shuffle and Sex

Nov 26th

I love my life.

Nov 26th

There is a woman applying deodorant…in class

Nov 25th

Talking about diets in math class.

Nov 25th

Mag mile and I say love a lot

Nov 25th

If you buy one cup of Starbucks a day you spend about 1500 a year. I’d rather go on vacation

Nov 24th

So I’m not going to graduate on time…

Nov 24th

I have been battling with vending machines all night, the machines won, I don’t have candy and...

Nov 24th

I’m looking for a nice way to say, I want out.

Nov 24th

I’m addicted to Jimmy Eat World

Nov 24th

Nov 24th

Nov 24th

Nov 24th

FIreworks coming out of a babies head

Nov 24th

Nov 24th

Nov 24th

Nov 24th

Nov 24th

Someone should seriously bring me some skittles

Nov 24th

Someone left a six inch subway sandwich in my fridge, I don’t know who it belongs to (not me...

Nov 24th

Mag mile!

Nov 23rd

I want to be loved like Moulin Rouge

Nov 23rd

I want you in a top hat, pants, suspenders, and nothing else.

Nov 23rd

Courtney should be here

Nov 23rd

OH: “I think if I dated a porn star…” now thats an odd way to start a sentence

Nov 23rd

He has a HUGE talent

Nov 23rd

Watching my friends band play at a bar… Once i saw him play at a library he has come a long...

Nov 22nd

Someone else’s thong somehow ended up in MY laundry…

Nov 22nd

Make that two thongs, two thongs ended up in my laundry that aren’t mine

Nov 22nd

My sister puppy was so excited to see me he puked

Nov 21st

I said “I don’t have std’s” my sister heard, “I have nice...

Nov 21st

There are certain things you don’t do at the dinner table…Taking your pants off is one...

Nov 21st

my teacher to a male student:”can u do a 3way with those 2 girls?”the class held their...

Nov 20th

Dear man on the train attempting to sing songs outloud that nobody else can hear because you have...

Nov 20th

The people sitting behind me think I can’t hear them making fun of me for the way I sat down....

Nov 20th

I think my boyfriend is trying to make “scoot” happen

Nov 20th

Ok I take my previous twitter back.. the man singing is mentally challenged.

Nov 20th

RIP Jessica

Nov 20th

I really am a rockstar.

Nov 19th

I really shouldn’t show people this picture..

Nov 19th

When you need participation points in class but don’t know what anyone is talking about text...

Nov 19th

OH: “we’re not being racist we’re just making fun of race”

Nov 19th

I have a really pretty picture of my roommate as the background on my phone.. Some people might...

Nov 19th

It was all fun and games til someone put pornographic drawings on my door…

Nov 19th

I saw a big vase of flowers with balloons that said “I miss you”and thought they were...

Nov 19th

OH: “There is something comforting about telling someone to go to hell politely”

Nov 19th

I have seriously got to stop doing the obnoxiously large and dorky wave to people while giving them...

Nov 19th

Countdown to when I get to see boyfriend: 8 days!

Nov 18th

The city looks really pretty at night

Nov 18th

Blowing bubbles with my bubblicious gum

Nov 18th

Today I am extra special

Nov 17th

Snow is like candy falling from the sky. I love candy.

Nov 17th

myspacebarhatestheworld

Nov 16th

I just got stuck in the bathroom

Nov 16th

I’m sad the roommate isn’t feeling well and won’t play with me.

Nov 16th

:)

Nov 15th

Penguin Love

Nov 15th

“He was acting like we were biffles” Who says that?

Nov 14th

Sparkle in His Eye

Nov 14th

Perfect timing

Nov 14th

I feel I’m just not getting through

Nov 13th

I swear to god there are leaves in my granola bar.

Nov 13th

I hate hate hate math

Nov 13th

“You Look Like a Boy”

Nov 13th

I want to get shot with cheetos. It’s my new dream.

Nov 13th

OH: “I’m shaking my cheese”

Nov 13th

Stinky lift.

Nov 13th

You don’t fall in love with people that make you wanna crap your pants

Nov 13th

OH:”I threw up on batman”

Nov 13th

Eat crayons. Poop rainbows.

Nov 13th

I feel like shit

Nov 12th

We tried to take the pickle but the man only offered us a bite

Nov 12th

We can leave without taking the mans pickle

Nov 12th

500 word paper in 20 minutes, how do I do it? It must be magic. I rock.

Nov 12th

I feel like I’m brushing my teeth with peanut butter instead of tooth paste

Nov 11th

Roommate: “I had intensive week in band camp” I don’t know, that just made me...

Nov 11th

OH: “yay my father is a man again!”

Nov 10th

Me: “He was pissed at me cause I was 15 min late” Best friend: “Just tell him you...

Nov 10th

Big black lady just said “vagina” and mentioned poop during class discussion.

Nov 10th

I like roller coasters

Nov 10th

: It looks like a light you would see on a ship or in a...

Nov 10th

I’m not trying to be dramatic but I’d rather shoot myself in the face than eat that food

Nov 10th

I am so sorry that you are a nut

Nov 10th

Discussing how mermaids reproduce…we decided that fish are gross

Nov 10th

Everytime Courtney talks what she says is status worthy

Nov 9th

Five hour long test? Check. Being a teacher better be worth it.

Nov 8th

My mom eats her muffins upside down.

Nov 8th

There are certain times where not even all the makeup in the world will make you look good. 5am is...

Nov 8th

I beat my high score in Yoshi touch and go. I feel accomplished.

Nov 7th

I sleep alot. Maybe I have mono

Nov 7th

The best kind of coworkers are the ones who buy you coffee

Nov 6th

A chinese tourist just took a picture of my friends and I. What the random?

Nov 6th

Then he chewed in my ear

Nov 6th

OH: “sometimes I wish I had a starch hood”

Nov 6th

I love that there is a picture of the Gruber family at the Obama Rally at chicagotribune.com

Nov 6th

My roommate kicked a hobo. She says it was an accident she thought he was garbage. She rocks.

Nov 6th

I slept…for 12 hours

Nov 5th

I feel important I got kicked out of a park but I am being escorted out

Nov 5th

I hate that I left my camera home today

Nov 5th

Playing the election drinking game!

Nov 5th

Rainbow sherbert shake made with sprite is the best thing that has happened to me today. woo!

Nov 5th

Cops with checkered hats are everywhere!

Nov 4th

Silly me thought I didnt need to drink all four cups of coffee this morning because I got 8hours of...

Nov 4th

I’m the only person I know that thinks “oh yea baby” when eating salsa

Nov 3rd

Obama chew toys for dogs? I can’t wait for tomorrow to be over

Nov 3rd

Just made a pot of coffee…it’s going to be a long night

Nov 3rd

My aunt bought two pools.. One for each dog because they don’t like sharing.

Nov 3rd

A turkey can run 20 M.P.H. Snapple fact for the day

Nov 2nd

I have so much to do..

Nov 2nd

Success!

Nov 2nd